Africans and Negros

So for some time I have been researching as much as I can and I'm starting to realize that when I thought about studying history and people I should've just did it back then. I have been reading th bible. Want to read the Torah and ,Koran as well. My husband found a video which I will link off to after editing(my phone is all I got). It talks about the difference between Africans and ,negros. It blew my mind but still leaves questions. I am a woman that questions lots of things. I don't think that what you read or hear should be accepted no have to do my own research for damn near everything. It's early in the morning though and I've got things to do while 66% of the kids are on vacation. I'd probably still go to bed at this time if they were home honestly. I need to get some sleep.

No Longer Winter; I Am Dutchess

I am literally only making a post because I realized this blog is still connected to my Instagram. I have recently gone through some things and found myself along the way. I'm still not done the treasure hunt but I know that I will be having a whole lot more to say about things. Make sure you keep up with the blog for the things too long to say. The things that may be a little more private. The time has come for all of us to love each other. No matter the gender color race ethnicity preference etc. life is too short to be that worried about what's going on in someone else's life. Use that energy to accept it , move on and find something that makes you happier. No need to waste the time it energy. Eventually I'm going to delete my blogs and start a new one. I've had this one since I was very young. It's all over the place. I don't visit it often enough so now it's time to start from scratch. Give you guys more than this. I promise I am here and present and it's time to start this thing.

30 DAY WEDDING!!!

We are getting married on July 31st and I am so excited. I figured since none of my videos work I'll be able to do a wedding series here on my blog. I will be giving as many details as o can as things change and get up to date. This is a real wedding on a budget. Not this budget that's like $5000 or even $1000. We are throwing a $200 wedding. Yes that was $200. Everything will be handed me downs,diy, and tons of group effort on the food. $25 for the marriage certificate $35 for the civil ceremony $60 for the hotel $0 for the reception $0 cash for food(help, coupons, etc) So far that's $120 so we have $80 left for diy projects and decor. Everyone is.being told to bring lawn chairs, and both grand parents have tables. The event is BYOB, and will be taken place outside so there will be yummy sliders and fries which is so us. The colors was the hard part. We had decided that i would do all the planning because it's such a short time that we had to be completely decisive at all times. I wanted a black and white theme with rainbow colors but when he found out he was against it. So it's not all whimsical now it's all black and white and more glittery and twinkling and elegant and i even pushed the time back a few hours so it's all beautiful at night. That was a big stress but i wanted him to be happy as well. The groom is to often forgotten. Only because we have a month was it such a hassle but i love him and he deserves to be excited about the wedding and not just the marriage. One of my best friends is a baker and i plan asking her to make the cake free of charge and I'll be able to get all the supplies for free for her. That leaves cake decisions, decor decisions, and diy planning to go. I'll post my self made time line in a few days and from then on I'll keep you posted and up to date with the timeline and pictures. Pictures of what idk. probably just the diy projects and things.

Wedding

My fiancee and I got engaged on December 12 and we were supposed to get married before my baby bump started to show. So now I don't know what we are doing. I hate to bring it up to him because I want to let him be a man and make his own designs but at the same time if history is indication, then i can't actually expect him to do on his own.I'll see what happens on our anniversary (July 9th) and our engagement anniversary(December 12th). Basically I want to be surprised. I just want him to show that he put some effort into doing something nice, not just money cuz that doesn't mean anything, and not just run me because being in a serious relationship means your time is already mine. I don't know what i should do because i feel like as the man i don't want to take anything from him. I want him to still have his manhood when we're done. And i don't want to rush him into anything but his words are so confusing. Actions speak louder than words though and his actions aren't saying anything. Idk.

Wedding

My fiancee and I got engaged on December 12 and we were supposed to get married before my baby bump started to show. So now I don't know what we are doing. I hate to bring it up to him because I want to let him be a man and make his own designs but at the same time if history is indication, then i can't actually expect him to do on his own.I'll see what happens on our anniversary (July 9th) and our engagement anniversary(December 12th). Basically I want to be surprised. I just want him to show that he put some effort into doing something nice, not just money cuz that doesn't mean anything, and not just run me because being in a serious relationship means your time is already mine. I don't know what i should do because i feel like as the man i don't want to take anything from him. I want him to still have his manhood when we're done. And i don't want to rush him into anything but his words are so confusing. Actions speak louder than words though and his actions aren't saying anything. Idk.

Another YouTube Video Fail

So i had another tutorial that was no good, but i keep on pushing. I don't have a day job so i stay home with my daughter. My fiancee just started doing some work for his dad. Hopefully this will last a whole so we can save up for this apartment. We have to move before the second baby gets here. I would love to stay. I love my M-I-L and S-I-L but being in the 3rd room in a 3 bedroom means the 4 of us is not a thing. We're going to be getting a place with my S-I-L best friend. He's like family. I think the friendship balance is good too. You never want to move in with your closest friends or family. But i think the match we have is perfect. I'm working on my diy-ing so that i can open the website. I have to come up with a mission statement but it's hard to think about my specialty. I guess it would be that everything is handmade or thrifts, so it's all one of a kind and generally affordable. At this point i guess my might be a blogger guru instead of YouTube. Unfortunately i don't have the proper camera, storage, or software to do this right now. What should i do for my daughter's birthday. The budget is tight and i don't want to make a big fuss because it's her first and she won't remember it at all. Plus, it is on independence day so everyone will have plans. I figured a small get together with a couple people with kids and what not. I'm just rambling on about my boring life. Gonna go watch some saaammage vlogs with my daughter.

Prices

Just like most new artist I'm earning my keep, so all prices are currently as follows. Weddings..............free Prom......................free Girls night out.......free Date night.............free "Everyday"............free Consultation.........free Lashes..................free Banquets...............free Graduation............free Everything right now is...for thee FREE

Trying

So I've tried to keep up with my not so awesome make up career. I've had tons of random things going on in my life so now that i have a working phone and tons of apps I'm going to blog more often and try my had at...CELL PHONE VIDS... Yea I'm gonna do tutorials from my phone. Honestly i don't even want to do YouTube anymore just because the t.v.commercials and what not. It seems mainstream now.
i don't want people thinking that I'm following the band wagon. I've been into YouTube since about 2006 so..... but hopefully i get a couple followers. In the mean time here are some photos from life My daughtet and fiancee Mother's day Selfies Stay mugging I know my post are always some update but this is for real. I can't wait around to provide for my family so i want to do VIDS so i have practice. Plus i , need start doing stuff during the day.but I'll get to that later So hope to hear from me more Ttyl

Testing Testing One Two Three...

I love blogging from my phone because i can use the talk features and talk to you guys and insert and edit after and then automatically upload with the app. Perfect.now i will be able to upload and also do short YouTube videos and pix on instagram. Nothing is going to be as great as it could be but i won't let you guys down anymore. I will have an update tomorrow.not sure if it will be here on my blog or if it'll be on YouTube. I'll decide

Kicking It Up

My baby girl has been kicking up a storm lately and I'm so glad to know that she is active and healthy. Don't know if I told you about the ultra sound that I had but we found out it was a girl so i'm super excited to finally know. It seems as though now she has a name and an identity(kinda) that she is just as active as can be.
She moves around the most around night time, especially when i'm laying down. I'm trying to figure out her patterns and what not so this is excited. She is a little daddy's already. Every time someone mentions daddy she just starts moving all over again. And when I'm on the phone with him, and when I'm around him. So basically anything associated with her father and she is moving and grooving. I think she's having a disco.
She had the hiccups earlier. I think she's had them before but I was never really sure, but that's because I'm never really sure about anything since this is my first child so what can I say.

When went to go visit daddy this week and he felt her move. He was excited and that made me all the more joyful. His mom told him it was probably gas. I think she is trying to burst every little bubble that this pregnancy has to share. I think she liked me before i got pregnant, now i think she feels i'm ruining her sons life and for that I apologize, but I won't be sorry for being the happiest I've been.

Life is starting to get really crazy and I don't know what I'm going to do, but i do know that i've got to  figure it out sooner rather than later. I've got a great man by my side though so we'll see what happens. Between the two of us I don't think there is anything that we can't get done